Parlezvous Francais?
by iluvmitsukake
Summary: What better way to get a French girl than to learn French, right? Fred Weasley thinks so. Oneshot


(Bonjour mes amies! I've been under the influence of good Dramione stories lately! (Others too.) I've started reading a ton of Harry Potter stories and decided to get of my keister and write this oneshot that's been swirling around my head since I finished Deathly Hallows. This takes place before Bill and Fleur's wedding. Enjoy! Also, since this is my first time writing out of the Anime/Manga realm you may not have read my stories before. Author notes are in parentheses.)

Disclaimer: _'Arry Potter n'est pas mon livre. _I do not own Harry Potter.

**Parlez-vous fran****ç****ais?**

"Erm, Fleur? Can I ask a favour of you?" Fred said nervously. Fleur looked at him from her seat at the kitchen table. "I-if you're too busy it's okay..." He trailed off.

Fleur beamed at him. "But of course! I am delighted to 'elp Bill's bruzzer! What do you need 'elp wiz?" (French accents aren't the best to write. The last word is 'with' if you couldn't figure that out.)

"Well, before the wedding... DoyouthinkyoucanteachmesomeFrench?" The last part came out in a rush. Fred looked slightly embarrassed. "Sorry, it was a stupid idea."

"I could not understand what you were saying. If you could repeat it, per'aps it eez not so stupid?" She chuckled at him.

Fred swallowed. "Do you think you could teach me some French?"

"_Tr__é__s bien!_ It eez a wonderful idea! Now per'aps you will be able to speak to _ma famille._ Zey will be delighted." Fleur smiled to herself at the idea of her future brother-in-law being able to speak to her family in French, instead of them always having to speak English. "I 'ave some time right now before your muzzer comes back. 'Ow about we start wiz pronunciation?"

'Brilliant,' Fred thought, grinning to himself. 'I'll have the French ladies flocking to me in no time.'

_Some time later..._

"So in French they don't pronounce 'th'?" Fred shot her a quizzical look.

"_Oui_, for example, '_Cathedrale_' eez 'ca-tay-drahl'." Fleur looked to make sure Fred understood.

"And 'r's sound like there's something stuck in the back of your throat unless they're double?" (I'd describe it phonetically if I could. There's just no way to put it into writing though.)

"_Oui_, like '_Pierre_' or '_terrasse_'"

"And you don't pronounce the last letter of a word unless it ends it 'c', 'r', 'f', or 'l'?

"_Oui_, _c'est __ç__a_."

'What does that mean?" Fred inquired. "You keep saying that, 'say-sah'."

Fleur laughed. "I do not know eezer. It eez somezing my teacher would say at Beauxbatons when we did well. Per'aps I should show you how to spell words _en fran__ç__ais._" She summoned a blank sheet of paper and a pen and wrote a few words on it. She passed it across the table to Fred.

"Kest cah." He read.

"Zat is what I just said. '_c'est_' eez a _liaison_ between two words. '_Ce_' and '_est_'. '_Ce_' eez said 'seh' and '_est_'' eez said 'ay'. Since '_ce_' ends wiz an 'e' and '_est_'' begins wiz an 'e' you take the 'e' off of '_ce_' and replace it wiz an apostrophe." She demonstrated, scribbling out the offending letter and replacing it with an apostrophe. "Now it eez one word. Ze ozzer word '_ç__a_' eez pronounced 'sah'. Even zough it eez not next to an 'e' or 'i', ze leetle mark makes the 'c' 'ave the same sound as if it was. It eez called a _cedille_."

"Fleur!" Mrs. Weasley's voice could be heard from the back of the house.

"Ah, I must go 'elp your muzzer now." Fleur tapped the paper with her wand.

"'Ere eez your homework. I 'ave put some tips on ze back for spelling. If we 'ave time tomorrow we will start on _des verbes_. Zey are ze 'ardest part, I zink."

"Fleur!" Mrs. Weasley bellowed. "I need help! I can't plan your wedding on my own, nor do I think you want me to!"

"_Au revoir_ Fred." Fleur smiled as she walked back to help Mrs. Weasley. "I will teach you some customs too!" As if she were having second thoughts about going and helping in the small room overcrowded with wedding things, she walked back to Fred quickly. Leaning in conspiratorially, she whispered in his ear, "If you want ze ladies to like you, just remember: _Permettez-moi assister vous_.'

"See ya." Fred's insides were doing a victory dance. 'I got this in the bag.' "_Permettez-moi assister vous,_" he whispered to himself. "Thanks Fleur."

_Three weeks later..._

"Not so fast, Your Holeyness," said Fred, and darting past the gaggle of middle-aged witches heading the procession, he said, "Here- _permettez-moi_ to _assister vous_," to a pair of pretty French girls, who giggled and allowed him to escort them inside.

From her hidden spot behind the bushes, Fleur smiled to herself.

'Shoot,' Fred thought. 'I messed up the conjugation again.'

(Yay! Another satiated plot bunny. I'm really happy with myself for writing something fun and educational. All French errors blamed on Mme Eichten. If anyone wants me to turn this into a chapter story and expand on the French lessons please tell me. Reviews appreciated! Au revoir!)

(Oh, the explaination of the end_. Assister _means 'to assist'. Fred added a 'to' so he essentially said 'Permit me to to assist you.')


End file.
